Forgiveness: A Harder Kind of Love

Colossians 3:12-17 (MP3)
The Path to Forgiveness

• Choose a perspective

1. Autonomous Self vs. Member of Christian Community
2. Victim vs. Recipient of God’s Grace
3. The Past vs. the Future

10 helpful truths about forgiveness (See Saying Yes to God, chapter six.)

1.  Forgiving others doesn’t mean denying the wrong.
2. Forgiveness means forgoing revenge. (Luke 6:27)
3. When you forgive others, you stop holding the offense against them. (1 Cor. 13)
4. Forgiveness doesn’t mean being foolish.
5. Forgiving others will set you free from being a prisoner to the past, if you begin to discipline your thinking.

•  Stop ruminating over what has happened. It’s not helping.
•  Stop trying to make sense of senseless behavior. It’s not possible.
•  Learn whatever you can from what happened, and then stop going over and over the failed or dysfunctional relational dynamic. Such internal churning will wear you down, and gives you nothing in return.
•  Maintain at least a neutral attitude toward the person who refuses to apologize, or is unwilling to seek healing in your relationship.
       6.  Remember, the future lies before you.
       7.  Forgiveness, then, means moving on.
       8.  Sometimes we need God to help us to release the poison trapped in our hearts and minds.
       9.  The next step is to genuinely desire good for their life.
    10.  Finally, forgive out of obedience while you wait for the grace to forgive from your heart.

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